#19: New Doorknobs

On July 7, 2011 I celebrated the fourth anniversary of closing on my condo and becoming a homeowner...and for four years I have put off installing new doorknobs. It strikes me as odd the things that we put off doing that in reality are so easy to fix. Now that I'm 30, I'm saying "good-bye" to getting locked in the bathroom, and I'm taking the time to make a few simple home repairs!


Step 1: Make time to walk 10 minutes to the local hardware store.

Step 2: Celebrate the purchase of 3 new sets of doorknobs over a pitcher of beer with your boyfriend.

Step 3: Out with the old, tired, sad and stripped doorknobs...

Step 4: ...and in with the new! And no more getting locked in the bathroom. ;-)

#4: Week of Private Retreat

One of the two owls that I saw on my last day.

In June, I spent four and a half days at the Eastern Mountain Retreat Center in the Berkshire Mountains on a personal retreat. The week leading up to my retreat, I found myself excited for the rest and relaxation that was to come. However, I quickly discovered on my first day at the retreat center that retreating is not easy!

The silence was foreign to me. Finding my way out of the technological noise that I encounter every day was surprisingly difficult. “Detoxing” from the chaos of everyday life was not immediate: no computers, no smart phones, no email, no iPods, no television, no bustling trains full of loud strangers, no street lights that emit a soft glow into my bedroom... I was in the middle of the woods with my books, a journal, and my camera and I didn’t know how to be still and relax.

I am a planner. On my retreat, I quickly began to realize that being still and quiet is extremely difficult for me; I was in a space (figuratively and literally) in which creating goals and an agenda for my day was not the objective. Typically, I establish daily goals, and I set out to achieve those goals so that I can feel a sense of accomplishment. A personal retreat is not about goals, or setting agendas, or accomplishing tasks to gauge one’s success by.

Transitioning into a space (mentally, physically and emotionally) that was the exact opposite of how I live my daily life was extremely difficulty and challenging. At the same time, it was also fulfilling, meaningful, and necessary. Anytime I found myself mentally scheduling my day, I would go and do something different from what I was planning. When I went into autopilot and was creating goals for myself, I would remind myself that the only goal for my time of retreat was to renew my relationship with creation and myself.

After a day and a half into my retreat, I realized that I was spending my time doing things that made my genuinely happy. My days were filled with reading (lots of Harry Potter), walking in the woods, photography, lying on rocks in the sun, drawing, and yoga/stretching. These activities allowed me to center on an internal happiness, and from that pure place I was able to ease into the silence and stillness.

My retreat was a very personal experience. I have come to recognize that there is no right way or wrong way to go about it. What is critical, at least of myself, is taking the time to be away from the noise of my life so that I can reconnect and be reminded of who I am and who I am called to be in the world.

Sitting in the wildflowers overlooking the valley.

Deer in the woods.

Bumblebee pollinating a flower.